How to Text Your Roommate About Cleaning Up
Living with someone who doesn't clean up after themselves is one of the most common roommate frustrations. The key is addressing it early before resentment builds, and framing it as a shared problem rather than an attack.
Collaborative Approach
Hey [Name], can we chat about the apartment for a sec? I've noticed things have been piling up a bit lately — dishes in the sink, stuff on the counters, etc. I'm not perfect either, but I think we could both benefit from a quick system. Maybe we take turns on kitchen duty each week, or agree on a "reset" day? Just want us both to feel good about the space. Let me know what you think!
Alternative Versions
Direct Version
Hey [Name], I need to talk about the apartment. The kitchen and common areas have been messy more often than not lately. Can we agree on a cleaning schedule? I think it would make things easier for both of us.
Gentle Version
Hey [Name]! No stress, but I was thinking we could try a little cleaning system for the apartment — nothing crazy, just so neither of us feels like the other is leaving everything for them. Maybe alternate weeks for kitchen duty? What do you think?
Formal Roommate Version
Hi [Name], I wanted to bring up something about our shared living space. I think establishing a cleaning routine would benefit both of us. I'd suggest we divide responsibilities or set a weekly reset day. I'm open to whatever arrangement works for you. Let me know your thoughts.
If this helped, you can support the tool
Everything here is free. Donations help keep it running and improving for everyone.
When to Use This
Use this when: • The mess has been building up consistently • You haven't addressed it before • You want to propose a solution, not just complain • You share common spaces that are becoming uncomfortable • You want to preserve the roommate relationship
What Not to Say
Avoid: • Leaving passive-aggressive sticky notes • Saying "I always clean and you never do" • Cleaning up their mess and then guilt-tripping them • Texting about it right after an argument about something else • Bringing it up in front of other people • Comparing them to a previous roommate
Frequently Asked Questions
Know someone who needs this message?